Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

A boy kills DEER & cooks it & doesn't tell friends what it is. He gives a clue "Its what my girlfriend calls Me!..

A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

Women's Rights.

when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

What is Alqueida's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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