Why can't the man get a good jod? Because he did not go to college and there for did not get a good education.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

A White, a Black, and a Hispanic man walk into a bar. They sit down and have a nice conversation, tip their bartender and then leave.

Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings? whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 bee stings? No! The holicost Whats worse than the holicost? What? 3 Bee stings

Why Did The Man Fall Off His Motorcycle? Because he hit a bus.

How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

Stop screaming! The damn uppercase letters make my head hurt! Let a lady have it for once!

We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

Women can vote? WTF

Heskey time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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