there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

There was a girl who had a dream of becoming a famous movie star. So, after five years of hard work and dedication, she didn't become a famous movie star. Dreams don't always come true. Refrigerators keep things cold.

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

I don't get it

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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