I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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Kim Jong Un thinks that he is in shape. And when you think about it, he's right. Round is a shape.

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Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

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Colin is gay but toasters are not

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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A man goes to the potty.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

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When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

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Why Do Black People Love Watermelon? Because Its A Delicious Fruit.

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What is a black, yellow like liquid that contains carbon dioxide, usually kept in a can, and is not coke? Pepsi.

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

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A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

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Why is josh such a retard Because when he was born a brick fell on his head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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