A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "I just found out I have AIDS"

why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

I saw a TV show last night. And it was good.

roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

Why didn't the little boy have arms or legs? Because they were savagely ripped off of him by a black bear on a very unfortunate camping trip.

A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

will you like this joke my sources say no

Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

A: Knock Knock B: 7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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