What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

What's brown and sticky A stick

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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