What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

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What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

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What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

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What's the best part about having sex with a bunch of 3 year olds? There's 20 of them

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

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What has 2 legs, a heart and a conscience? YER MA

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How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

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What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

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Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

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What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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A:Who am i "RRRRRR' B:A pirate A:No im fetty wap

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Half life 3 confirmed

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

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Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

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Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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