The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

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Why was the boy so tired? He had to carry his moms dead body up the stairs.

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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Why can't black people get sunburned? Natural selection allowed ancient Africans to develop a darker skin shade that would counter strong UV rays.

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

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In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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Maybe You'll Find Someone Else To Help You... Maybe Black Mesa... That Was A Joke...Haha...Fat Chance...

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

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How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

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a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops