Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

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You wanna hear a joke? Your dick.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

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Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

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Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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Why couldnt the man stop dancing? He had Parkinson's.

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What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike

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How old is victor? Half past dead

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Once a upon a time there was a girl named Cinderella. She rubbed a magic lamp and a genie appeared. Then a guy named Larry Harry walks into a laundry mat. 7 days later she died.

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Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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Ben Corbishley

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KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

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What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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