Q: What's so funny about medical records? A: You're not the one dying.

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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What happens when you mix breed a cat and a human?? .. you get arrested and get raped by your fellow prisoners DONT do it!

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

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whats the worst kind of homework? child abuse

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

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Hello Braydon I am at home where are you?

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How do you get dislikes on anti-joke.com? You can dislike your own post from several different IP addresses.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

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i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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What's worse than a guy staring at you? Two guys staring at you.

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Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

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Knock knock Who's there Orange and Banana Orange and Banana who? ... The man opened the door and saw a bowl of oranges and bananas.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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