what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

What did the Asian say after he had a nightmare? Nothing his nightmare was actually reality and a dishwasher fell on him and killed him.

Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

why do jewish people have big noses? because air is free

Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

Whats slower than molasses? A dead baby.

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad this joke is over?

Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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