What do you get for the man that has everything already? Another one.

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Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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Q: What's worse than tripping down the stairs in front of a crowd of people? A: The bombing of Hiroshima

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It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

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hi

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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What's the simularity between a eagle and a rock? They both fly, exept for the rock.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17

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Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

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My peni s

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Why did the man kill the hamster? To get to the other side.

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If you were a cactus, why?

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Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

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Q: How did Mary get frostbite A: Her mother locked her in a freezer

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What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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