A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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A ginger man ascends to heaven and reaches the pearly gates, seconds later he wakes up in a hospital bed and realizes it was merely a near death hallucination and God isn't real.

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What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

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I'm going to rewrite history. History.

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Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

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why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

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What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

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What's more fucked up that the Bill Cosby rape accusations? Sam and Adele's shower time on a Wednesday night

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

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Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

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What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

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What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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