I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

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What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

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WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

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A: That's a catchy song! B: You know what else is catchy? A: What? :) B: Herpes. Awkward silence.

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I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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Why was the cancer ward sad? They just lost a patient who couldn't ward off cancer.

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Why did the chicken change the projector reel? To get to the other slide.

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Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a school bus? A dog and a school bus are not sexually compatible and therefore they cannot reproduce.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops