What's white and has a crusty nose? Luke Lange

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Try this on your friends and make them look dumb So a plane crashes on the border between the USA and Canada. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury the survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

thumb_up thumb_down -8

An Irishman walks into a bar.....Duh.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the man yell at his wall? Because it jumped out and scared him when he walked past

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did sally fall of of the swing she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -8

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

roses are red violet are blue what are you gonna do when chuck norris find you

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Hellen Keller went to town a ridin on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it.. ashhlerthurbujahustar.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

two elephants in a bathtub Elephant 1: pass me the soap Elephant 2: no, radio!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops