why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

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Eddie Murphy's recent film career.

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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when life gives you lemons, you should go to the hospital as you may have dyslexia

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What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

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a blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on top of a mountain. they freeze to death and the rescue team discovers their frozen bodies two days later.

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Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

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Whats green and fluffy? Your mom.

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Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

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You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

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What do you do when your girlfriend is bleeding? She is probably on her period.

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Where do dizzy cows go? In circles...

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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the awkward moment when a sentence doesnt end the way you think it octopus

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

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What's the difference between men and women? I really can't tell anymore, there's so many goddamn transvestites.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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