Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human being and one is an inanimate object that people enjoy sitting on.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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Sex

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What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

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What's black, green, and doesn't have to take a shower? I have no idea.

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Why did the janitor commit suicide? He was sick of people's shit.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

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Why did Mexico enter the war? Because they were bombed.

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A termite walks intio a bar, looks the lovely timber bar up and down, and wonders out loud..."where's the bar tender?"

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

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* anti-punchline

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

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Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops