A father and his son get into an accident and are whisked away to the hospital. The father dies, and the son is brought into surgery. The doctor is rushed in, but looks at the boy and says "I can operate on this boy, his my son." How is this possible? The boy's father was a zombie.

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran Wrap? - "That's for food. You should wear clothes instead."

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How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

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roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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Q: knok knok A: Im home

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Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

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A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

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What is Abraham Lincoln's favorite website? Wikipedia. It's very informative. On second thought though, the Internet had not been invented yet back in his time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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