If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. It's also a bistro, and they have a lovely lunch together.

John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

way do Japan bomb pearl harbor because America hat sex with China [watch Hetalia]

Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

Whats worse than losing your phone? Buying a new one and then losing that

What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

What's the same between a bike and a duck? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

Poker? I barely even know her.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

why is andreas making a pizza? since he dosent get laid he likes the feeling of the sauce stinging on his dick

What do you call a black man? A normal human being

What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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