How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

whats funny? this joke. just kidding. your face.

When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

Why did the chicken cross the road ( The chicken says) I dream of a world where a chicken can cross the road without having morals questioned.

What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

Why was the orphan's christmas sad? He got a violent chest infection and died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...