That`s my friends phone, I can call you from mine too if you want, please just don't hurt me, let me speak to you, I promise I will explain everything.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

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An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

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q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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Did you hear that the actress, Reese what's-her-name, got stabbed to death? Witherspoon? No, with a knife.

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Knock Knock. GO AWAY!

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

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What did Zeus say to Hades? Nothing. Both are mythological beings created by the Greek civilization to explain why many things in the world happened, mostly because of a lack of modern science.

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

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Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family

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what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

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What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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