What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

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What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

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How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

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Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

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How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't, she's dead.

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner promptly calls a local farmer to let him know that his horse has escaped again.

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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whats green and slimy? green slim

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woman's rights

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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What is the only non-racist animal? The mexican panda. Why? It's black, white, hispanic, and asian.

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What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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Joe is a negotiator. When joe sees someone in trouble, he tries to help them out of it by talking. Joe failed to talk to Osama bin laden correctly. Joe is no longer living in this world. Joe drank his sorrows away and died from the alcohol in his body. Osama is completely unrelated to this, his family died in a car crash.

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Uh, Liz, he is staring at the screen... He says you are right and knows, so he cant get mad, ill trust you both, but it better work, or this one is on me. Oh by the way, yeah he is eating, sorry its late here, and I am the only nurse here about now Ironically this place is full of doctors but they dont seem to give a crap about the man that pays their checks. Doctors said no, Nero said "you are fired" Doctor changes his opinion, glad to see he is taking charge around here, I am just worried about his sleep, he is beginning to halucinate and I doubt any stimulants will help. But fine, ill trust you, sorry, really shaking my boots here, I really do not want to, but this is not about me.

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Why was Allen late for work? He was mauled by a bear. Allen is dead.

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Yo Mama is so fat that she should probably make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon.

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What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Q: What's the best part of having sex with twenty-seven year olds? A: By age twenty-seven the average person has reached sexual maturity, and has also developed mentaly enough to understand, and subsequently process the intimate nature of an adult relationship.

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There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops