Roses are red. Violets are blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a blue and black dot on the wall? A fly wearing blue jeans.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do men and parking spots have in common? Both often have cars on top of them. Vehicular manslaughter is a serious issue.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a boodle and a scoodle? Ladoodle!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What's black and blue and is all over Timmy's mother? A: The bruises his father gave her when he came home drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the black man walk into the catholic church? He was catholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A guy at a baseball game....

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock, Knock. Who's there Hey, it's Dave. Oh well come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops