What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

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Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. It is a gun store and he needs to buy amunition after using all of his to fend of a home invader, and protect his family. He lives in a bad area because he never went to college and cannot get a well paying job in this economy, so he can't afford to buy a house in a better area He then used the gun to rob a bank. He no longer lives in a poor area

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Why are birds purple? because it fits the sky why are bats purple? bats aren't purple

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People who do not realize the concept of this website, and write real jokes on it.

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What do we want? Equal rights for people with Tourette's Syndrome. When do we want them? Fuck!

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Two swallows migrate to Africa. One swallows initiates the conversation, that's when the other catch fire.

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How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

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Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? Cut the rope!

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wake n shake = wake up and masterbate to a picture of drew e mom o.O

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Do you know why this joke isn't funny. It's punchline is bad.

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What do you say to Jews at a synagogue? Hitler is coming

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What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

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Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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Rivals? Someone from the past? Erron, who is "WE"! Tell me now!

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With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

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what is the difference between a dead baby in a bag and a dead baby hung in the yard....the dead baby hung in the yard was shot down off the cross after being rmr'd

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A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

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What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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