Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

Why did Ian die Because I shot him with a gun

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

swag

Whats 9 plus 10? 19

Why did the weiner dog that punctured Doris' bladder get carried away during an oral sex session? Because the dog had a terribly troubled childhood which led to a faliure to adequately function in adulthood

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words are merely the smallest element of language capable of containing meaning and isolation and, as such could never directly produce the 4,000 Newtons of force per square centimetre required to break bones.

Hey, did you see that episode of Glee last night? It was awesome! Especially that scene where they all sang. It wasn't as good as the previous ones, but I think the show it making a comeback.

What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

penisvaginaorgasm

Why did kenny the koala fall out of the tree? becuase kenny was dead. Why did kesha the koala fall out of the tree? because she was hit by kenny while he was falling.

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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