Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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yo mammas so fat when she gets cut gravy pours out

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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Why is Osama dead? He got shot.

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What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

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So, a man walks into a bar. Suddenly, the universe around him cracks, unable to sustain the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

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why cant women draw perfect circles? no one can becouse it is virtually impossible

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What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

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Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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What Did The Farmer Say When He Lost His Tractor.... "Wheres My Tractor"

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So this chat, the talk on the phone was all a ruse?

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Ubisoft 'Very Impressed' By Pokemon Go, Working on AR game of their own.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops