How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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Why are Pine trees green? Because light reflects at different wavelengths, and the chlorophyll, found in chloroplasts, being abundant in the needles of pine trees, Reflect the correct wavelength for green.

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whats long and black? a baton

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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What do you get when you cut a stick of butter? a butt.

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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woman's rights

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

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why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

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Why didn't the man laugh at his son's joke? Because he was born without a mouth.

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Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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What' worse than random Holocaust jokes? The Holocaust

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How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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getting a call from the hospital saying that your whole entire family was all killed in an explosion and they were killed from your best friend.

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So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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