Potassium? K.

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, the orphanage did not have sufficient funds to give everyone a present because they did not want to how favoritism because the orphans are already sad enough and te orphanage does not want the orphans killing them selves

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Panda walks into a restaurant with gun ready to eat, shoot and leave to finish a really good grammar joke, but before he can eat, Animal Control tranquilize him and seize his gun. So all he can do is leave unconscious. Meanwhile someone takes enjoyment in slowly burning the dictionary entry for "Panda".

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What is it... Michael J Fox has a small one, modonna doesnt have one, Arnold Shwatznegger has a long one, the pope doesn't use his, and bill clinton uses his a lot. A last name

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What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

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what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

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What's harder than breaking up with your girlfriend? A stone.

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2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

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NEVER

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Three guys walk into a bar. They each have a few drinks. Then all three leave responsibly in a taxi.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

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What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

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how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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