Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

Knock knock Who's there? Guess who. You have 4 options: A. Jeremy Stevens B. Donald Jefferson C. Richard Gillespie D. Paul Faggot Um A? Nope, the correct answer is D. Paul Faggot Oh hi Paul, come in.

Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

Doctor Doctor, I keep getting horrible boils all over my face! Okay then. Take off your underwear and we'll see what's going on.

A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

Sex

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

None of the sex jokes are not funny or not funny. They're just inappropriate.

Why did the bus drive off the cliff? It's driver happened to be a tomato.

a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

What's black, green, and doesn't have to take a shower? I have no idea.

how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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