Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

poo

KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

So a man walks into a bar... ouch

why did the girl fall off the swing? her dad threw a refrigerator jlr

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

How many black people did it take to change the light bulb? I couldn't tell, the lights were out.

whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

-Knock Knock? -Who's There? -David Baxter. -David Baxter Who? -Wha- What? What do you mean "David Baxter who?" We were best friends in high school. YOU WERE THE BEST MAN AT MY WEDDING!! *David Baxter proceeds to cry, as he doesn't know of his dear friend's Alzheimer's disease*

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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