A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

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What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

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Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

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trump and hillary are both stranded on an island, who survives? america

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Me, get naked bitch!

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it's weird how Jesus came out of the cave on the same day as Easter

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What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

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What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

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Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

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Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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