A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

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9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

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Why do Mexicans always have heart burn? Because the food is spicy.

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What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a very challenging question.

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Why couldn't the black man get his lawnmower to start? He was too poor to own a home =)

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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Gus's mom

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Whats worse than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork

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Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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why was the blond so easy,because ALL blonds are whores.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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