Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

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What could be worse than a giant paint bubble? The Holocaust.

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what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

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What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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Why couldn't the boy hide his penis? Circumcision.

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What's annoying and wears glasses? The kid next to you

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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Eric is gay Ha

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why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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who's specky and stinks of shit? josh moran

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What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

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69

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Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops