What do porn stars do after they retire? No clue but some idiot made a movie about it.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

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I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

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Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

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what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

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What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

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What do a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails. Except for the fork.

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have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

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An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

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What do you call a dog that can't pass an Algebra test? A dog.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

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What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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What did Batman tell Robin when they got to Gotham City? -Robin, we got to Gotham City.

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Study from real life: My trip to Texas. (From the time when I was interested in mormon-ism.) Texan: And here is my gun collection, great for shootin yer Mexican scum. Me: Uh I am Norwegian but my ancestors where Russian or something so my skin is... Texan: *points gun at me and pushes trigger halfways* Just kidding der son, sure you aint no Mexican though? Okay just checkin ya know... Me *sweating bullets* Texan guys gun go off almost hitting me and breaking a vase.. Conclusion: He blamed me, everyone had lunch outside later, everyone kept looking at the "trigger happy MEXICAN"... Nero: By then I began grasping the fact that I was better suited for the study of the dark arts... And also learned that in Mormonism, Heaven and Hell are planets locked into war, where black people where neutral, and red people are demon supporters, but WE CAN ALL BE SAVED BY BECOMING WHITE! JUST LIKE THE ANGEL MORONI! Conclusion two: Moroni... Lol.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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