What do you call a black person pimping out his bitches? a dog breeder.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What happens when you get your leg caught in an elevator door? Nothing. It is likely that the elevator has advanced sensory components that won't allow the door to close on your leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I used to have an ugly,black and disabled man as a friend. However, he had a very nasty personality so we are no longer friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A rabbi and a nun walk into a bar. They grab a drink and really hit it off despite their differences. After a couple years of happy dating, the rabbi, Mark, preposes. Gloria, the nun, gladly accepts. After four months, Gloria is pregnant. She dies in childbirth. The child has many illneses and dies within a week. Mark commits suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I'm Batman.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a dog with no legs? Disabled.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the chicken say to her chicks? One day I'll explain why we do this. For now, just follow me.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I got a brother. He's bigger then you.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops