You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

What do you call a black man with a Ph.D? Doctor.

Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

why did joe drown ? he had no arms

What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

knock knock! who's there? a fat salesperson here to deliver your supplements

A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

I am tying up hostages. - Ethan R. 2015

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

poop

What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...