Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Three men on a journey stop at a farm and ask the farmer if they might be allowed to stay the night. The farmer consents upon one condition: that the visitors not lay a hand on his daughter. The men respected the farmers wishes and left in the morning.

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Justin Beiber

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Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

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A lion and a cheetah raced each other and the cheetah won Lion: "man you're a cheetah!" Cheetah: "no you're lion!" Then the cheetah tears off the lions head and feeds it to their babies

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what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

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What is the best way to eat a dead baby? I don't know. That is incredibly disgusting.

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How many anti jokes can you make from one joke? 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. And so on.

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Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

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What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

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What is brown and sticky? Maple Syrup.

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Small Penis.

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A white man/women works behing the counter at a 7/11

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What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

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A black guy, a jew, and an asian walk into a bar, have a beer each, and then leave, because they have high-paying jobs and don't want to risk getting DUIs.

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Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

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You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

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Why did the child not go to his mother's funeral? He was adopted, he didn't know his real mom.

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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Q: Why did the little boy drop his toy? A: He fell and broke his wrist, then dropped it in the emergency room, due to the broken wrist.

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Two guys walk into a bar. But the third one was a duck.

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Q: What do you call a blonde that just bought a new car? A: Carol

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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