A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, it hurts when i poke my leg like this!" The doctor says,"Mm yes, it seems you have taken an arrow to the knee. You'll never walk again."

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

Why did the dog chase the cat. Cause he was fking hungry

Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

A muslim in Iraq was sniped in the head by US forces. He was a terrorist, who killed 18 innocent people.

what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

Two muffins are in the oven, one muffin says "Gosh it's hot in here!", the other muffin says "HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!".

what is the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color.

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

every knight i see an owl at window

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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