my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Why did the little boy grow up to be a homosexual man? He didn't find the female reproductive system sexually appealing

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How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

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How old are you? 7

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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lil billy wuz killed cuz of hiz relijuz beliefz

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How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

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Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

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how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

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whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

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How do you call a gay that is playing poker with friends You say "call" and place the right amount of fiches on the table, at that moment you are still in the race to win the pot.

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What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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How do you get Pikachu on a Bus? Pikachu Is A Fictional Charecter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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