PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

Q: What's black, long, and floppy? A: Black Licorice

Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

Who is John Galt?

Why did the dog chase the cat. Cause he was fking hungry

what happened when 3 had sex with 4? nothing numbers are not capable of sexual intercourse

why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

why was the cat black it was a black cat

Q: How do you keep an idiot in suspense? A:

taking out the trash... at night

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

im not black, im Joseph Kony

A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

Why did the portuguese fisherman take out a $20,000 loan with a reknown loan shark at exorbitant interest rates? He needed to buy a kidney on the black market for his drug addicted daughter who had also destroyed his credit score meaning he coudln't get a loan from the usual credit facilities such as banks and credit unions.

Why was the black man running? he was participating in race for the cure, a charity event where all proceeds go to breast cancer awareness.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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