How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo mama's so fat because her BMI is considered obese on the scale.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo mamma's so fat, that she weighs alot.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hey, guess what. What? ... Hello? Sorry, I don't talk to strangers.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the hooker fall out of the tree? Because she was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +8

your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks to a bar and sees a very hot blonde sitting across the room. Turns out it was actually a blonde man and they both had a wonderful night because they were both homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

the NAACP

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops