How do you piss off a gypsy? Curse at him

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White guy: I figure she's a gold digger, my neighbor. Black guy: Did you say the N word?

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pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender goes why do you have a cane? The man goes "I'm blind."

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

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Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

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Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

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Aiming with a revolver? That`s fucking overrated. with a heavy powerful revolver such as this one, you do not necessarily need to aim that well at the heart of your enemy in order to blow his brains out.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

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Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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Korean man, "Hi, I'm the President of North Korea!" Man, "Oh wow! What's your name?" Korean man, "Kim."

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Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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We could have had it all Rolling in the deep You have my heart inside of your hand As you've just now inexplicably ripped it out of my ribcage.

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kkkk

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Want to hear an anti joke? Me too thats why Im on this site.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

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Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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