Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Nothing because he got knocked out because he was running too fast and hit his head.

3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? You can't find a ferrari in my garage.

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

What's black, white, and red all over? A: Me after domestic abuse.

How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

Why did the little boy fall out the window? A child molester pushed him.

why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

Whats worse them finding a worm in your apple??? finding out your adopted

Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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