Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

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so there was a frog a bear and a walrus... i forgot how the rest goes but they all die because of a nuclear holocaust

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Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

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black people swimming

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Whats the differwnce between a little girl and a fridge? The fridge doesnt scream when i put meat in it

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a jew!

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A miracle

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What do you get a when you cross a chocolate bar and some haribo? A disease complex characterized by persistent hyperglycemia caused by insufficient insulin production or resistance to the metabolic action of insulin. Diabetes mellitus (DM) is generally classified as insulin-dependent (IDDM, type I), non-insulin-dependent (NIDDM, type II), or secondary diabetes mellitus

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How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

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How many moms does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They make you do it!

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If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Seeing as this situation is logically impossible considering that Adolf Hitler died in the year 1945 and Osama bin Laden was born in the year 1957, I would be in a room with just a black guy and two bullets. Then I would proceed not to shoot the black guy on the fact that I enjoy the talking and learning about cultural diversities between the black and white races.

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LeBron James proposes. So what does he put on the girls finger? Ben L.

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What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

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Four blondes are driving to Disneyland, as they finally got to Florida, they read a sign that said "Disneyland: left" so they turned around and headed home.

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roses are dead violets are gross guess what i'm in your closet

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops