Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh good I thought you wouldn't make it.

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Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

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11/9 Americans won't get this joke.

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So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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Why wasn't the white guy voted for president? He had down syndrome

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

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Title IX

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

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ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

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Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

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A: knock knock B: who's there A:come in B:come in who?

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops