what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

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What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

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Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

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how man

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

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What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? extremely unfortunate...

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What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

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how do you boil oil? add b to oil

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cancer

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What do you call a baby that fell in lava Dead

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How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

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Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

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Q.What happens when Torres scores A. He doesn't

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Ben: do you want to hear a joke. jack: yh go on then, i bet its funny. Ben: Your future.

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Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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