Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

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there once was a black man who played basketball

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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A man walks into a bar he orders a drink

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y did simran cros rode? 2 get 2 uder side ofcurse. stopid nobs

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

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Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

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How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

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why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

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This is the same thing you told me once, believe me, it helps holding into it.

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What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

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A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

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What is the difference between a bitch and your ex-girlfriend? First of all, they are two different types of mammals. Second, dogs don't talk.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

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Why couldn't the Muslim eat pork? He didn't have a tongue.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops