Yo mamas so fat that when a bus hit her she said " who threw that pebble at me"

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What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

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Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

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What do you call a man covered with cottoncandy and goes to the store and buys a jar of pickles? George

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Hey, Have you Seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he!

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Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

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What's worse than eating spinach? Dying.

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what's funnier than AIDS on a holocaust boy? everything. AIDS and the Holocaust are two terrible things.

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Two men walk into a bar, get drunk, and drive home. Unfortunately, they crash into a tree and are mortally wounded.

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Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

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Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

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How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

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what do you call a jew hanging from a tree? dead

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I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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Two kids are playing basketball. One says to the other, "FAILMUFFIN!" The basketball flies out of bounds.

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

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Did you know that Obama wasn't born in the United States*? *the contiguous United States

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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