Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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Why did the hipster get burned? Because he was a volunteer fireman.

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

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How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

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What's worse than Gordon Brown's face? George Bush.

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whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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A man walks into a bar After months of rehab he is giving in to his drinking abuse again and will ruin his life as well as his family

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

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Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

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Q: Whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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What was the best part of the holocaust? A: none of it, it was a terrible event in history and hopefully is never repeated

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Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Im a dog

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hold the planet Dumb ass well I'm doing something else right now dumb ass

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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Knock knock Who's there? You're You're who? YOU'RE MOM IN MY BED!!! (i know it sucks)

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Atheism

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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