Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

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Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

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Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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PENIS lol

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff!

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I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

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A white, black, and Hispanic man walk into a bar at 2:00 in the morning. Unfortunately the bar closed at midnight, so they were charged with breaking and entering, and were sentenced to 2 years in prison.

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roses are red, violets are blue, dandelions are yellow, tulips are pink, sunflowers are black and yellow, my dick is 13 inches long.

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There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

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Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

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Useful Information: *2+2=5 *4+4=9 *6+6=13 Q: Given this information, how many fingers am I holding up? A: It was a trick question. Batman didn't open the door.

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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