pobody's nerfect

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what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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How old are you? 7

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

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a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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roses are red, violets are blue, penis

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

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whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

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Roses are red Violets are blue My head itches I'm going to get this guy to itch it for me

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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I'm pretty sure you can't throw a fridge...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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