Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

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Yo mama's so fat, that we are all extremely concerned for her health.

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"Knock knock" Come in!

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff!

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I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat salad instead of sandwiches because she wants to lose weight by going on a no-carb diet.

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What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

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ive been a naughty girl, and i need something to plug my hole. call or text me;) 1 (802) 299-5281

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Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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who looks like a double rainbow? gun baby who was pregant and rapes her

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

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A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

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Useful Information: *2+2=5 *4+4=9 *6+6=13 Q: Given this information, how many fingers am I holding up? A: It was a trick question. Batman didn't open the door.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops